Tuesday, July 20
Tao of Bong
Like many stoners before me, one of my favourite ways to spend my time is to design and make bongs. I'm better at designing, generally, but CompleteAnarchy seems to do nothing else. I believe his mission in life is to convert every sort of bottle that exists into some large pipe for narcotics.
We all know roughly how a basic bong works. And if we don't, here's a relativly accurate pictured plagurised from Everyone Does It...
The chicken legs are, by the way, optional, but that's how a bong works. Thumb over the rush hole, light the dish (should be full), then toke away. When you've toked all you can, remove thumb, finish toking, then breathe out.
But this is just a layman's bong. Yes, it will get you mashed, but there's so many avenues to explore! Ice! Tubing! Pumps! And other stuff that's beyond me.
I had the suave idea of using two loads of water, to doubly purify the smoke. You can see the problem already, can't you? Gravity. And using lots of tubing, while a suave idea, is beyond me.
While I ruminated on this yonks ago, my man Nick suggested using a ball sat in a hole as a valve. Inspired by this, I designed this:
But when me and CA tried to make it, aside from the obvious problem of not having a ball, we discovered that there was no way of making it un-leaky. So we gave up and just used a normal bong.
But now, since I've got nothing else to write about, and I feel like plagurising ideas from Fully Ramblomatic again, its time for a Less Is More Competition.
That's right! Design A Bong!
Send me an e-mail at the usual address, with your gnarly design for a bong. Consider the plagurised picture as a guideline for where to start, and add all sorts of crazy decorations, extra features, whatever, that you like.
It doesn't need to be immaculate, long as its not a bag of shite. Extra marks will be given for pretty pictures, however, and moreso if you actually make it.
Next week, I'll run up the best entries, with scores based on criteria you cannot hope to fathom.
And I'll design one too, just for giggles.
Get to work! There's no special bias for being my girlfriend, being my ex-girlfriend, being a smacktard... no, there is there. Just draw SOMETHING!
That is all.
We all know roughly how a basic bong works. And if we don't, here's a relativly accurate pictured plagurised from Everyone Does It...
The chicken legs are, by the way, optional, but that's how a bong works. Thumb over the rush hole, light the dish (should be full), then toke away. When you've toked all you can, remove thumb, finish toking, then breathe out.
But this is just a layman's bong. Yes, it will get you mashed, but there's so many avenues to explore! Ice! Tubing! Pumps! And other stuff that's beyond me.
I had the suave idea of using two loads of water, to doubly purify the smoke. You can see the problem already, can't you? Gravity. And using lots of tubing, while a suave idea, is beyond me.
While I ruminated on this yonks ago, my man Nick suggested using a ball sat in a hole as a valve. Inspired by this, I designed this:
But when me and CA tried to make it, aside from the obvious problem of not having a ball, we discovered that there was no way of making it un-leaky. So we gave up and just used a normal bong.
But now, since I've got nothing else to write about, and I feel like plagurising ideas from Fully Ramblomatic again, its time for a Less Is More Competition.
That's right! Design A Bong!
Send me an e-mail at the usual address, with your gnarly design for a bong. Consider the plagurised picture as a guideline for where to start, and add all sorts of crazy decorations, extra features, whatever, that you like.
It doesn't need to be immaculate, long as its not a bag of shite. Extra marks will be given for pretty pictures, however, and moreso if you actually make it.
Next week, I'll run up the best entries, with scores based on criteria you cannot hope to fathom.
And I'll design one too, just for giggles.
Get to work! There's no special bias for being my girlfriend, being my ex-girlfriend, being a smacktard... no, there is there. Just draw SOMETHING!
That is all.
