Wednesday, May 5
Tales From The Crypt
Simply because I haven't finished any other updates (although I have stared about five), here's some of the milkings of my Totally Not Secret "Short Stories" file. Not long enough to be proper updates, not short enough to be dashing one-line observations, just right for tying together and throwing up under the pretense of an update. Enjoy...
1.) Computers are lots of fun. They can land spaceships on the Moon, calculate Pi to a million decimal places (why anyone would want to...), and they let me post this twaddle up on a regular basis.
The other day, for no other reason than boredom, I went out and downloaded some GIF animation software. For those of us not so technoliterate, that means I can make PICTURES THAT MOVE! And I have. Here now are some pointless twattybollocks banners I drew in Paint. Download them (no direct linking, I trust you all more than that, but I need the bandwidth, damnit!), and stick them in your sigs/websites/AVCE coursework. And link back to me! I like the ego that comes with hoardes of people I don't know looking at my little blog, and thus far, Google isn't helping much. Unless you actually search "Less Is More Chyld", and then you end up finding a Lord of the Rings forum.
So, without further ado...
2.) Due to my incredible lack of money to spend on a new phone (mine keeps freezing...), I'm involved in a pointless exercise in human pikiness. I've paid this wesite £20 for a CD of phone-type things. I was then added to a monolithicly huge list of people who had done likewise. For every 28 people added to the list, the top person on the list is removed, and given a phone of their choice free. Hence, a phone and a useless CD for £20. Plus whatever you wasted on eBay to get the URL. (Some morons pay £50 for such "information". I paid a fiver. I'm still a moron.)
How did they get the phones? Despite their claims, it can't actually be legal...
[ringing phone]
[/ringing phone]
Mr Phone Company Boss: Hello?
Mr Website Man: Hello, I'd like lots of cheap phones to give out free to people who buy this CD from my website, and...
MPCB: I'm sorry, we don't do business with smacktards. Good day.
*sounds of security being called*
MWM: We'll talk terms on Monday then...
3.) My floppy drive seems determined to drive me mad. In one evening, it caused three crashes, one broken floppy disk, and upteen rude words as I tried to transfer useful information from laptop to internet-wired computer via useless husk of metal and plastic.
The other day, I bought me a USB pen drive off of that wonder of the internet, eBay. Such a lovely miracle of electronics can hold many essays, dance between computers like David Beckham through women (if you'll believe the tabloids), and actually hold a MPEG filesworth of porn (talking about that will probaly scar 105% of the readership for life), and the sooner I get it the better. Here's the other reasons why:
-Smaller/lighter
-Holds more information
-Easier to use
-Won't snap when Chyld gets pissed off and needs something to break.
4.) Finally, here's a quote from a conversation I had with CompleteAnarchy the other day. 27th April, when I wrote about my stoning exploits of the previous Saturday. I'm the one shamelessly plugging my website...
http://less-is-more.blogspot.com/ - Stairway to heaven says:
o yeah, you might want to look at my blog 2day - its all about what we did on saturday
OB says:
haha safe ya shit tell me the website
http://less-is-more.blogspot.com/ - Stairway to heaven says:
it's in my name, CA
OB says:
lol o ya
Speaks for itself.
Now click "Forum" and give me some more for the archives...
1.) Computers are lots of fun. They can land spaceships on the Moon, calculate Pi to a million decimal places (why anyone would want to...), and they let me post this twaddle up on a regular basis.
The other day, for no other reason than boredom, I went out and downloaded some GIF animation software. For those of us not so technoliterate, that means I can make PICTURES THAT MOVE! And I have. Here now are some pointless twattybollocks banners I drew in Paint. Download them (no direct linking, I trust you all more than that, but I need the bandwidth, damnit!), and stick them in your sigs/websites/AVCE coursework. And link back to me! I like the ego that comes with hoardes of people I don't know looking at my little blog, and thus far, Google isn't helping much. Unless you actually search "Less Is More Chyld", and then you end up finding a Lord of the Rings forum.
So, without further ado...
2.) Due to my incredible lack of money to spend on a new phone (mine keeps freezing...), I'm involved in a pointless exercise in human pikiness. I've paid this wesite £20 for a CD of phone-type things. I was then added to a monolithicly huge list of people who had done likewise. For every 28 people added to the list, the top person on the list is removed, and given a phone of their choice free. Hence, a phone and a useless CD for £20. Plus whatever you wasted on eBay to get the URL. (Some morons pay £50 for such "information". I paid a fiver. I'm still a moron.)
How did they get the phones? Despite their claims, it can't actually be legal...
[ringing phone]
[/ringing phone]
Mr Phone Company Boss: Hello?
Mr Website Man: Hello, I'd like lots of cheap phones to give out free to people who buy this CD from my website, and...
MPCB: I'm sorry, we don't do business with smacktards. Good day.
*sounds of security being called*
MWM: We'll talk terms on Monday then...
3.) My floppy drive seems determined to drive me mad. In one evening, it caused three crashes, one broken floppy disk, and upteen rude words as I tried to transfer useful information from laptop to internet-wired computer via useless husk of metal and plastic.
The other day, I bought me a USB pen drive off of that wonder of the internet, eBay. Such a lovely miracle of electronics can hold many essays, dance between computers like David Beckham through women (if you'll believe the tabloids), and actually hold a MPEG filesworth of porn (talking about that will probaly scar 105% of the readership for life), and the sooner I get it the better. Here's the other reasons why:
-Smaller/lighter
-Holds more information
-Easier to use
-Won't snap when Chyld gets pissed off and needs something to break.
4.) Finally, here's a quote from a conversation I had with CompleteAnarchy the other day. 27th April, when I wrote about my stoning exploits of the previous Saturday. I'm the one shamelessly plugging my website...
http://less-is-more.blogspot.com/ - Stairway to heaven says:
o yeah, you might want to look at my blog 2day - its all about what we did on saturday
OB says:
haha safe ya shit tell me the website
http://less-is-more.blogspot.com/ - Stairway to heaven says:
it's in my name, CA
OB says:
lol o ya
Speaks for itself.
Now click "Forum" and give me some more for the archives...
